Kitty

selegend-homez:

mement0mori:

noo-raah:

good things will happen

bitch when

The girl reading this <3

beyoncescock:

me doing homework:

• pees
• checks fridge
  
• drinks water
• *looks at clock*
  
• “i still have plenty of time”
  
• scrolls tumblr
• opens youtube for relaxing music-
  
• then finding myself watching cute cats and dogs
• opens new tab to finally start homework but instead types tumblr.com
• “i need a 15 min break i deserve this”
• *30 mins after, still scrolling through my dash*
• *staring at the wall trying to find the answers
• but ends up thinking what i’ll eat next*
  
• *looks around trying to find someone to blame for my life*
• *does something irrelevant*
• “im so tired!!!“
• *sleeps*
  
• *wakes to pee*
  
• *looks at clock*
  
• *cries*
  

macarena-of-time:

i love saying fuck me because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly

mjalti:

eclipticzero:

mjalti:

my plan is to jog in a zip code where the average house is $1 million dollars. i jog everyday. i run into the trophy wives jogging club. we jog past each other so often, they’re forced to interact with me. we’re friends now. i’m invited places. i meet other millionaires, men who love me. i marry the richest, using an alias. throughout the first year of marriage, i’m moving assets and cash to an off shore bank account. i fake my own death on our anniversary. he’s heartbroken.

i started jogging in a new million dollar neighborhood. i’ve just made friends with the local jogging crew headed by ashtonlynn and brotyna “chichi” who has a single millionaire brother,

Is there any version of this plan where I don’t have to jog

u only have to jog past the ladies which is like 46 seconds. suck it up for the fraud of it all

cobx:

rip to the songs we love but dont listen to anymore bc they are associated with bad memories